The Cheese Interviews
--Smurfy--
Written by: CheesyBoy
Cheese: Hello, I'm Cheesy Boy, and I'm here with my little blue friend.
Smurf: Hello, it's smurfy to be here.
Cheese: Yeah... that is just what I was thinking, smurfy... So umm, what do you do all day?
Vexing Smurf: Well I'm Vexing Smurf, so I basically piss people off all day.
Cheese: Well, you don't seem annoying.
Vexing Smurf: Well that's very kind of you, but I have no choice in the matter.
Cheese: Why not?
Vexing Smurf: Well it's my name... I have to follow my name.
Cheese:Seems kind of stupid, basing your whole life on a name.
Vexing Smurf: How dare you insult the Smurf traditions! Have you ever seen Grouchy Smurf happy? Or Painter Smurf not painting? No, no you haven't! I'm a Smurf, and I do my job, whether I like it or not.
Cheese: Can you change you name?
Vexing Smurf: Change... my... name? Well, I guess. They did rename Sodomizy Smurf, but that was an extreme case.
Cheese: Excuse me but... there was a Sodomizy Smurf?
Vexing Smurf: That was the cruelest three years ever.
Cheese: YOU LET SODOMIZY THE SMURF RUN AROUND FOR THREE YEARS!!!!
Vexing Smurf: Well what were we supposed to do? We have no police smurf; it's not our fault if no one is born with the name Police Smurf.
Cheese: But on that show you were always fighting that ass wizard, who was he?
Vexing Smurf: Gargamel. And we didn't fight, if you look back we ran. We ran like little smurfing bitches. I only wish we had a smurf born to the name Bad Ass Lone Warrior Smurf. Ohhh, that would be smurfy.
Cheese: Why not just train to protect the smurfs? Vexing Smurf doesn't really fit.
???? Smurf: Hmmm, but what would I change my name to?
Cheese: How about Samurai Smurf?
???? Smurf: Can I be kind of evil too?
Cheese: I know! Demon Samurai Smurf!
Demon Samurai Smurf: I like it...
Gargamel: Ha Ha, I'm going to get you smurf! Azreal get him!
Demon Samurai Smurf: I think not...
Gargamel: OH MY GOD! AZREAL! What has he done to you?
Cheese: From the look of it he disemboweled your cat.
Gargamel: Nooooo, Azreal... What will I do with out you?
Demon Samurai Smurf: Don't worry, you and you cat about to have a lot in common...
Gargamel: Help me... urg...
Cheese: Dude, I know that wasn't real, but I feel dirty just watching that shit.
Demon Samurai Smurf: Boo ho Whiny Smurf.
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