4th Shot:
Ohh yeah, He's in this isn't he?
Written by: Cheesy Boy
Patently waiting in line to get to the ticket counter at the airport, Spotlite wondered, and quietly condemned Cheesyboy, Kain and Transmetal for there arrogance.
What’s wrong with them, thought Spotlite that they think they can walk to Japan faster then a plane can fly there? It’s like they think they are gods or crap. Well they’re not gods, there idiots, and I’ll prove it to them.
And what the fuck is wrong with this stupid airport, I’ve been in line for 3 hours. When he finally got up to the counter and asked the teller about this she responded “You should arrive three to four...”
“Yes, yes. Three or four hours in advance, but I should be going through security by now.”
“You didn’t let me finish sir,” said the teller in her nasally voice. “You should arrive three to four weeks in advance.”
“What?!” cried a confused Spotlite. “I need to get here a MONTH in advance? What the fuck is this crap?”
“Well sir, the Department of Homeland Security has added extra security to all airports, for your protection of course.”
A month, thought Spotlite. No matter, even if I am delayed a month, I’ll still get there before them.
But the minutes turned to days, and days turned to weeks. Forced to eat overpriced food from the airport cafeteria, and getting his only reading material from the duty free shop, he went mad.
What is the matter with these people? Why would they do this to us? He thought, It’s obvious to anyone that if one metal detector couldn’t find the plastic knifes used to highjack a plane, then fifty metal detectors and people checking shoes wouldn’t do crap if you taped it to your chest. And they wouldn’t be able to start forcing people to take off shirts with out a riot. Well, maybe they could. I mean, look at the crap their putting up with as is.
He was doing well; he made it to day twenty three. Then he made a mistake. It was a simple innocent one; he talked to a soldier off duty. Yes, off duty. “I like your uniform.” In truth, he really didn’t.
Unacceptable, he’s obviously a terrorist they said. He was imprisoned and given no phone call.
Eventually someone came to talk with him. It was someone from the Department of Homeland Security. “Admit it, your out to destroy our way of life.”
When he didn’t confess, they threw files in front of him, three actually. Opening them up, he saw that they were for Cheesyboy, Kain and Transmetal.
“We know you’ve been in contact with these people, and we believe them to be extremely dangerous.”
“Figure that out on your own?”
“No, we have teams for this stuff.” He didn’t get the joke, or if he did he ignored it and continued on. “They are wanted for arson, grand theft auto, creating a pile up on a free way, drugging two cops, exposing them selves to a bank full of people...”
“I was there for that. That one was pretty fucking funny.”
, and eating a sandwich.”
“What’s wrong with eating a sandwich?”
“Damnit, those carbohydrates will kill them. Haven’t you read those books on the Atkins diet?” he was out of his chair and screaming by the end of the sentence.
“So what do you want me to do about it?” said Spotlite.
“We will lighten your punishment if you help us catch these fiends.”
“Alright they are going to Japan, can I go?”
“Aren’t you fiercely loyal to them?”
Spotlite didn’t respond. Why should he, it was a stupid question, of course he wasn't.
“Not even a little.”
“Japan, they will probably go through Europe and Asia to get there too.”
“Aha! You are protecting them. If they were going to Japan they would go west not east.”
“They’re scared of California.”
“Yeah, me too. Alright, you’ll go get them for us, and well let you go free. We will set you up with a plane that will take you to Europe and then you bring them to us.”
There not this stupid, right?
“We’re trusting you.”
Okay they are.
And that’s how Spotlite got on a plane going over Europe. While looking out the window, the captain spoke “Currently we are over Italy...”
To be continued in Stage 5: Word of B.O.O.